SmokeLong Quarterly

How many times have you spilled coffee/tea/water/beer/soda in your keyboard, and is there a “perfect” greaseless food that can be eaten while typing?

I try to spill things only on other people’s computers. Bananas are good since they come with a built-in holder—except, sometimes you have to take a big bite at the end to keep your hands clean.

Do you find that when the keys get too slippery it might cause you to type the word “freak” instead of the word “great”?

Slippery keys are a freak excuse. Thanks for the idea.

What inspired this funeral piece?

My mother really does talk about funerals — but not everytime I call.

What are some of your favorite books?

This one’s even tougher. They’re all my favorites while I’m reading them. The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood, The Sparrow by Mary Doria Russell, Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley, Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula LeGuin, The Gate to Women’s Country by Sheri Tepper, The Illustrated Man by Ray Bradbury, Foundation by Isaac Asimov.

An uncanny number of writers I’ve met say they knew they would be writers right around fourth grade. What is it about fourth grade, do you think?

Maybe it’s learning cursive handwriting—suddenly you realize you can slam all those ideas onto paper faster than you ever believed possible. Or maybe it’s when you discover you’re a geek.